It's 4am now. I basically used up an hour or more into something I should not be doing, at least not for now. I'll be conducting an 8-hour marathon talk today. I am tired of this. I am tired of doing all these.... Hope I can find a time to rest.
Been dreaming often about my family. Of mother walking well again. Of us being together. Every time I have this dream, waking up becomes so frustrating. I wish I can sleep forever and dream of them. I really want to go home.
Today is father's 70th (?) birthday. Oops, why that question mark? Honestly I don't really know his real age, nor that of mother, or my sisters and brothers. I know the month and the day, but why can't I remember the years? I know no one's exact birth date but mine.
Recently I've been expressing heightened disappointment over out college system. The university system, actually. [Lord, help me to change my perception, values, and reactions - everything. Help me to stand tall in the midst of this repressing situation. Help me to accomplish more from this life that you have blessed me with.]
Oh going back, I still miss my family. So much.
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