More to Life

Something's missing. I don't know exactly what it is but I feel this great void in my heart. I know I need to finish a lot of things before tomorrow but I just can't get enough drive to do all these. Not even start.

I feel like crying but seems like even my tears would not cooperate with me. I can't seem to find a tear to cry.

What's this hollow that I feel deep inside. My mind still thinks of him. And the other 'him'. What for? There's no way to redeem the past and even if I can I won't return to it.

Missed church yesterday. I wasted, literally wasted my whole day.

Never had a communication with my family too. I want to talk with them but I was so lazy to dial my phone. They wouldn't call me too because what we have is a one-way street. The only exception would be is that if something bad happens back home. Or if they need my financial assistance. That would be the only time they'd call or text me. That is why, I dread receiving their message too.

My cousin called me up yesterday but I was soundly asleep and missed her call. Later she YMed that with so many people she contacted, nobody has answered her call. I can totally relate and I feel sorry for her.

My job. My job is disturbing me even in my slumber. What will I do with my life? Is this the right place for me? I wanted to be happy too, even just for just a short while.

I planned to continue with my schooling but I was so.... I don't know. I don't know exactly how to describe myself with regards to this.

Been roaming the chatroom for someone to talk to but nobody seems worth spending my time with. There are so many perverts roaming the net. This world is losing its color.

It's 2pm now and I need to go back to our office for some overtime work but I am tpo lazy to move. I feel so lacking. Lacking of so many things.

I had a very disturbing dream last night. Something about the coming of a very strong storm. The environment was so weird and murky.

I don't want to continue in this condition. I want to live. I want to enjoy life.

There is more to life, I believe. But what it is, I am not sure of. I want to know. Soon.